by Brad Rose
Like a phantom limb, I pay people to have fun on my behalf. If it’s done right, eventually, you get used to it. Whenever the music is as friendly as a pastel trench of twitching pit vipers, I’m perfectly comfy dancing inside my comfort zone. After all, veterinarians are animals, too. In fact, now that the investigators have finished investigating themselves, self-congratulations are completely uncalled for. It’s not the buttons you push that matter, it’s the buttons you don’t push. By the way, my second cousin, Mona, swears it was that abandoned crucifix-shaped swimming pool that made her quit drinking. She says that since her virtual baptism, she can cross herself without using her hands. She’s happier than a bushel of invisible magicians at an illusionists’ convention, although I’m not sure whether her life-like sobriety is a hack or a trick. Like they say, any excuse in a storm. Hey, you don’t think those are my headlights up ahead, do you? Yeah, the bright ones shining on the magnetic palms. For a minute there, the trees looked so real as they leaned against one another, they nearly fooled me into thinking that opposites attract.
Brad Rose was born and raised in Los Angeles, and lives in Boston. He is the author of four collections of poetry and flash fiction: Pink X-Ray, de/tonations, Momentary Turbulence, No. Wait. I Can Explain, and two forthcoming books of prose poems, WordInEdgeWise and Lucky Animals. Seven times nominated for a Pushcart Prize and three times nominated for the Best of the Net Anthology, Brad’s poetry and fiction have appeared in, The Los Angeles Times, Big City Lit, The American Journal of Poetry, New York Quarterly, Puerto del Sol, Clockhouse, Folio, Cloudbank, Baltimore Review, 45th Parallel, Best Microfiction 2019, Lunch Ticket, and other publications. Brad is also the author of seven poetry chapbooks, among them, Democracy of Secrets, Collateral, An Evil Twin is Always in Good Company, and Funny You Should Ask. His website is www.bradrosepoetry.com His blog is https://bradrosepoetry.com/blog/